Category Archives: gratitude

Becoming an Elder

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When a neighbor drove by as I was walking, she rolled down her window and pointed behind us with a smile and said, “Home is back that way” . . . “we’re going to need that kind of help someday.” We laughed and she drove on, having reminded me that we are conscious about getting older even though we still feel young.

Part of my ministry is to craft a worship service once a month for Unitarian Universalists and their friends who are residents of a retirement community near our church. In that environment I feel too young at 70 to have a real understanding of life at 80, 90, or 100 (as two of them will soon celebrate their centennial birthdays!).

Part of my personal quest is to age with a certain amount of grace and purpose. To that end, I signed up for a four-week, on-line webinar on Eldering. It’s designed for spiritual companions like me and equally important, for my future decade(s). Getting older can also be a path to becoming more open-hearted and appreciative of life at any age.

The New York Times Magazine has a weekly column entitled “New Sentences.” Translated from the original Japanese, author Sayaka Murata writes, “I’m now thirty-six years old, and the convenience-store-worker-me is eighteen.” (Click on the image to read the short commentary by Sam Anderson.)

I salute you, at each of your inner and outer ages!

 

Summer break

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Favorite yoga pose photo by Matthew Ragan on Creative Commons

 

July was a special month for me this summer: I stayed at home and rested! No trips, no commitments, no appointments other than purely social. It was a respite from a busy schedule for which I had to buy an oversize calendar to keep track.

The year of busy-ness culminated in a stretch of travel in June. First, hubby Jon Montgomery and I drove to Navasota, TX, for my graduation ceremony as a spiritual director (Formation in Direction). From there we drove to The Woodlands where I delivered the sermon for the 40th anniversary of Northwoods Unitarian Universalist Church. Then we went to Shreveport (my home town) for a gathering of family and friends from far and wide to celebrate my cousin David Trichel’s life, share stories, and marvel at how quickly the younger cousins are growing up.

My sister Madeleine, who had flown in from Columbus, Ohio, went with me to visit our former choir director (and her organ teacher) and his wife, Bill and Lucille Teague. They are worth their own blog post!

Madeleine rode back to Austin with Jon and me and stayed for 5 days of museum visits, coffee with friends, and general hanging out. That Sunday she flew home to Columbus and I flew to Kansas City for Ministry Days. Jon drove to pick me up and we enjoyed a rambling road trip back to Austin.

So in July I didn’t want to do anything but catch up on sleep, read for pleasure, and visit worship services all over town, from St. James Episcopal to the Austin Zen Center. And I started working out a little more often. With a more relaxed schedule I’ve had time to use stretchy bands at home, do yoga, or even go to the Y! My neighborhood is great for morning walks because there are hills to turn a walk into a cardio workout. I never took up running, but my knees tell me that’s okay–just stick with walking. Walks don’t do much for my arms, though.

At the Y, I have especially enjoyed yoga with Jogi Baghat. Unfortunately for me, he’ll be in India for a couple of months, welcoming groups and showing them around his home country. Someday I’d like to join one of those groups.

As for biceps and triceps and general upper body strength, I have preferred to use individual machines–like stationary rowing for a full body warmup, then arm presses, pulls, and pull-downs (those are technical terms, of course!). Last week I ventured into the pool for an Aqua Cardio class and it was great! Cool water is a bonus in the heat of summer; water resistance makes every move strengthen muscles, elevate my heart rate, and engage my core. Those muscles appreciate a few minutes in the hot tub after class. Afterward, I feel both tired and invigorated for the rest of the day.

At the beginning of my second class, our instructor Ali announced her exciting news that she is retiring from the Y on the 16th–and there was a great chorus of dismay from the class. We will miss her! We’ll have a sub for the rest of August, and the hiring process has begun for a long-term replacement. It will be interesting to get accustomed to a new instructor even after just 6 hours with Ali, who has been very welcoming and supportive of newcomers as well as seasoned class members. Ali hinted that she might join us in the water from time to time, just not leading the workout.

Town Lake Y has a variety of water aerobics classes every day with various instructors, one of which will match my skill level and instruction style. Water feels really good to me after years of land-based activities.

What have you been doing this summer?

Spiritual Friendship

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Tilden Edwards wrote a book entitled Spiritual Friend: Reclaiming the Gift of Spiritual Direction. He is the founder of the Shalem Institute for Spiritual Formation, where many of my teachers studied.

Edwards spoke to my heart of a “calm trust in grace winding its opening way” through one’s life.

Grace has been winding its opening way through me. I stood in a small park last Spring and saw with fresh eyes each raindrop on the grass, the trees, and the lily pond as grace. A gift that was mine for the taking, created by unseen forces.

I walked around the pond and took pictures of water lilies and a small cottontail rabbit nibbling, undisturbed, on lush wet grass. It was an experience of grace.

pond-in-distance lily-and-bud bunnyThis year I have visited monthly with a spiritual director in between classes to become a spiritual director myself. “Direction” is a bit misleading; it’s more like a conversation about one’s spiritual life. How does spirituality shape the way I live in the world? What’s the reason for prayer?

Since August I have been more faithful (again) about daily meditation / contemplation / prayer / what have you. I’ve increased the time gradually all the way up to 22 minutes in the morning and about 2 minutes at night as I settle into restful slumber.

In the evening I take a series of three breaths and repeat as long as needed while I focus on being grounded, on being full of gratitude, and on God as Love. The three Gs make it easy to remember:

1) Grounded. I belong here and I can rest now.

2) Gratitude. For grace that came my way this day, for friends, for opportunities and challenges, I give thanks.

3) God. Let all abide in love. Let love guide our lives.

Gratitude in the morning for having seen a new day, and gratitude for the day as I drift off to sleep, are now the bookends of my daily life. How does grace “wind its opening way” through your life?